"kissing the pericardial" by Addison Long

Poetry - Grapevine, Winter 24/25 Issue

i am no more than a creature when i love her

i want to crawl inside her

skin, making it a home until her

form is no different from mine

i want to rip out her

heart and cradle it tenderly, taking care of her

most vulnerable part until it's mine

i want to force myself inside the crevices of her

brain, to fill it up until her

thoughts are all stained by me

i want to take her

apart, see what makes her

tick, then, in return, pray she’ll look at me

i want to let her

break my ribs and rummage through my organs, her

touch an embrace meant only for the deepest me

i want her

to vivisect me and force her

way inside, although all of me is now hers anyway, not mine

i need her

to sink her teeth into my flesh, her

mouth covered in blood and filled with me

and i am never going to tell her

the true depth of how her

very being has consumed me

i can’t see this creature reflected in her eyes